Outrun Burnout Before It Outruns You

Neringa Jagelavičiūtė,  Language & Confidence Coach

As Valentine’s Day approaches, let’s name the often-unspoken third party in our love lives: work.

I spoke with a friend the other day. Her words made me pause: “I can’t even think of going somewhere with my spouse during such an intense period at work.”

When stopping feels impossible, that’s often the clearest signal that a pause is needed. We live in a culture that rewards constant motion, but movement without rest isn’t productivity—it’s endurance. And endurance has limits.

In this article, you’ll discover two simple ways to reframe your beliefs so you can create healthy distance from your work (or from routine activities like parenting—which is work, too).

Beliefs: The Silent Power Behind Our Choices

As a coach, I work a lot with my own beliefs and those of others. Beliefs are powerful systems in our minds, acting much like a GPS. They have a profound influence on where—and whether—we arrive at a certain destination (think: your dream life, a long-held goal, or something you once thought unattainable).

Challenging our beliefs isn’t easy. But it can become surprisingly enjoyable once we step out of autopilot and, even for a moment, dare to question things as they are.

Ready? Let's dive in!

Challenge No. 1. Reframing Productivity: Is Busy Always Valuable?

In general, what is your attitude toward being busy? What qualities do you usually attribute to someone who says they are busy? How do you feel when you say you’re busy yourself? If you were to draw a portrait of your “busy” self, what would it show?

If you couldn’t name the portrait “Busy (Your Name),” what other adjective would you choose?

For example, imagine a portrait called Busy Neringa. If I replaced busy, I might choose wondrous.

Now think of a few synonyms for your chosen word. For wondrous, my synonyms could be powerful, wonderful, or amazing.

Next, think of some antonyms—the complete opposite of what you chose. In my case, they would be weak, disastrous, or delusional.

What we’re doing here is gently challenging established beliefs. This doesn’t mean you have to adopt new ones or believe them fully. It’s simply a practice of questioning your own thinking—and that’s self-coaching.

Challenge No. 2. Reframe Rest As Strength

I love languages. I occasionally learn new ones—though I wouldn’t necessarily call myself a polyglot. What fascinates me about languages is that they offer a glimpse into completely different ways of thinking.

Have you ever heard the word fika? Any idea where it comes from? (Hint: think IKEA.)

Fika is a Swedish tradition—a coffee break often shared with something sweet—during which people slow down and socialize with friends, family, or colleagues. It’s not just about drinking coffee; it’s a meaningful pause in the day that encourages connection. Fika is equally valued at work and in leisure time. I’ll share a link to a wonderful BBC video that explores fika in depth — it beautifully captures the essence of this tradition and why it matters.

What I love about Scandinavian culture is this unhurried pace of life. Fika is intentionally built into the day, almost as a collective agreement to pause, connect, and breathe.

Isn’t this, in many ways, at the core of what makes life feel content and sustainable?

Take a moment to reflect: does rest translate as laziness in your mind? In mine, it often does—until I consciously switch that belief off. Let's gently unpack what “lazy” is protecting us from.

On a scale from 1 to 10—where 1 means “it doesn’t resonate with me” and 10 means “it strongly resonates with me”—how would you rate the following statements?

• I can’t allow myself to rest because I’m afraid of falling behind.

• I can’t allow myself to rest because I’m afraid of being judged.

• I can’t allow myself to rest because I’m afraid of feeling what I’ve been avoiding.

  
  

Now that you see your numbers, focus on the statement with the highest score—the one that resonates with you most. Where do you think it comes from? Can you recall anyone in your family who might have voiced a similar belief?

Now, let’s do something a little unexpected. Imagine offering this statement as a gift to the person who appears in your mind’s eye. Say to them: “Thank you for your insight. Now, I’d like to explore my own definition of rest.”

Finally, I’d like to invite you to consider this: why is forcing a break actually an act of courage?

I’ll leave this with you. Let it accompany you through the day. Allow answers to surface in unexpected moments—under the shower, standing in a queue, stuck in traffic, or while having dinner.

Conclusion

Remember: beliefs exist only in our minds. While many of them help us achieve great things, some inevitably hold us back from becoming our best selves. They’re much like friends or colleagues—some are supportive and empathetic, while others can be self-centered or limiting.

To outrun burnout, you may need to challenge deeply rooted beliefs about productivity and work. You might even need to question your values—and ask whether they truly belong to you.

I wish you all the very best on that journey.

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Further research

Can this Swedish tradition make you happier at work? - BBC News

Illustration by Zoha Gohar on Unsplash